In just a few days, it will be Mother’s Day. I’m still trying to figure out where April went. Is anyone else wondering where the time goes? In a few days, I’ll be heading to New York to visit with my family. I don’t always have the opportunity to be “home” for Mother’s Day, so spending Mother’s Day with my mom is a special treat.
But I get to celebrate even more this weekend. Five years ago on Mother’s Day weekend, my sweet little niece was born. This Saturday, I will attend little Shadia’s birthday party! Yup! Imagine my surprise and delight when I learned my little niece would be named Shadia. To this day, that loving gesture blesses my heart and brings tears to my eyes … mixed with a few tears of another kind.
Perhaps you can relate. Like many holidays, Mother’s Day can stir up all kinds of emotions. Some of us have lost our mothers, some may be estranged from them, and many of us have suffered the tragedy of having lost our children. The stories behind the losses are countless: perhaps a miscarriage, or an illness or accident, maybe your child went to war and never returned, or maybe, like me, you lost a child to abortion.
I’ll never forget the day. It seems a cruel irony that it was within a week of Mother’s Day was when I lost my only child to abortion 33 years ago. It took many years before I embraced the healing power of God’s love and forgiveness through an abortion-recovery program held at my local pregnancy center. It was then – ironically the weekend before Mother’s Day in 2008 – when I found the courage to name my child.
Even to this today, the act of choosing a name for a child is especially dear to my heart. When my brother told me the reason his daughter was named after me, I was even more moved. You see, just a few years before my niece Shadia was born, her older brother was conceived. When my brother learned of the pregnancy, he panicked, not sure he was ready to face fatherhood. By God’s grace, I had the courage to share with him my story, which helped my brother to see clearly in the midst of momentary fear and panic. Today, he is a loving father of three, overflowing with joy and devotion to his children. And while he credits me with helping him find the courage to choose life for his son, I give God all the glory and honor and praise!
Have you ever meditated on this thought: 2,000 years ago, when God the Son entered the world He created, he did not arrive as a fully grown man, or even a newborn, but rather chose to enter the world as a fertilized egg in His mother’s womb. I cannot think of a more amazing testimony of the value God places on motherhood and preborn life, can you?
As for me, I know I will hold my daughter one day in heaven, but until then, each Mother’s Day – rather than being reminded of my regrets – I will be reminded of God’s redemption – and His tender love for bringing a little piece of heaven down to earth for me to meet, face-to-face. Happy Birthday, little Shadia!
May the Lord also bless you with His tender mercies as we honor our mothers and the gift of life this Mother’s Day.
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father … ” (James 1:17)
If you (or someone you know) is struggling with the memory of a child or children lost to abortion, please know you are not alone. If you have never fully been healed of the heartache you are carrying, perhaps now is the time. There are many wonderful resources out there to choose from. You can download my story Nameless No More for free just by signing up for my quarterly newsletter. I’ve also incorporated my story into a personal study guide for finding healing in my book Worthy of Love: A Journey of Hope and Healing After Abortion. In it, you can read my story of the miraculous way God chose to heal my heart, as well as find comfort, healing, and hope through the loving and powerful Word of God, which promises us, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.“ (Romans 8:1)
This is a precious promise! I pray you will claim God’s promises today. Download the first chapter of Worthy of Love for free.